When the Shit Hits the Fan

WHEN THE SHIT HITS THE FAN

What do we expect when the shit hits the fan? We expect anger, fighting, uncomfortable situations, and also a solution of some kind. This week, at school, we received some very surprising and unexpected news about our Colombian tax situation. There has been a change in the laws and we have all moved tax bracket, in fact, for the 2004 fiscal year we all sat very comfortably in this new tax bracket; unbeknownst to us. So, when the news reached us.. almost two years too late, along with a very scary estimated bill including late fines, the questions began to be asked. Why weren’t we informed? Did no one know? When did it become our responsibility? The answers received were less than satisfactory and so, in full North American Working In A Team Spirit, we started warming up rights, and a few lefts, ready to pitch the shit directly into the vortex of the fan. We expectantly awaited anger, fighting, uncomfortable situations and even, could we be so bold, a solution of some kind. A day and several bottles of wine and hoarse throats later we received information from a couple of recognized and trustworthy accountants, versed in the confusing mess that is Colombian Tax Law, and were told to wait. Things can probably be ignored to a certain extent or smoothed over, the fines are not as bad as they say and,… just wait for a bit.
And so one, or at least I, now must sit and reflect, as I often do about the state of the nation. What happens in a culture where the shit never hits the fan? What happens to all that shit? I can only conclude that the law, politics and the culture in general uses what must be now a very long suffering bread knife to spread the shit out. This allows everyone to keep moving, cuts down on the smell significantly and also helps mask the shit as just one other small stain of dirt on the road. The problem is that after ninety years of civil war the layer of shit is now quite deep. I once helped my grandmother clean out an old chicken coup. I remember digging and digging and never coming to the end of the shit. I believe we finally gave up on the project and just built another building. Which is what I am doing.. I am flying the coup. I do hope to come back one day, when anther building has been built and perhaps in this new building Barranquilla will learn from the monkeys they have in their zoo. The monkeys know that shit is not meant to be spread thin, in belongs in our faces or in the fan. It smells, it makes us angry and uncomfortable but does sometimes lead to a solution of some kind.
When I finally receive my actual tax bill, padded and smoothed out, it will be good news for my pocket book but not all good news. I really was, secretly, very excited about the shit hitting the fan.